May 09, 2000
Since all the rage these days seems to be pimping and turning out a stable of hos for some cold green, this month we've decided to provide you, the reader, with the ability to test your pimp IQ, or “Pimpitude Factor” as Albert likes to call it. Simply follow the link to this month's Pimp Test and answer all the questions honestly, because this, unlike that gossip board thing, is totally anonymous. It wouldn't be anonymous, allowing us to save your answers for future blackmail use, but since Albert is constantly kept busy masturbating and traveling back in time to shove Jesus, he hasn't learned the CGI scripting that would allow us to do that. Also, we've been told blackmail is bad and may lead to vampire private investigators paying us visits with his fist.
INSTRUCTIONS: It's a quiz with little buttons you click. How stupid are you? But when you're done, be sure to read our HGNews Blaxploitation primer.
ESTIMATED TIME FOR COMPLETION: 10 minutes, 20 if you haven't kept up with your Language Lessons.
NOTE: We, HGNews, HGI, or any other affiliated party is not responsible for any mental, emotional, or physical harm caused due to your participation in this exercise. We also are not responsible for harm caused to your social life or negative employment/productivity consequences because you do not have the will power to pull yourself away from this activity.