TOMSERVO55: A STUDY IN OBSESSION

WE CAN'T DRIVE, TOMSERVO55

The Adventures of "TomServo55" in the Land of the ForeverMST3K

Appendium to this Experiment from the HG Ultra Labs

Case Study Experiment Code: TomServo55

It's interesting to note how the Test Subject seems to suffer from (or develop) Multiple Personality Disorder during the course of the experiment. Among the personalities that were witnessed;

A 12-year-old boy
A Professional Software Developer
A Hacker/Cracker
A Chat Channel Operator

And, in a very interesting display, he not only begins to take on the identities of his perceived "captors", but projects his own deeply buried Homophobia on them, as well. At one point,the Subject began to split into so many diverse personalities that the HG Lab Personnel were forced to abort the experiment out of fear for the patient's mental well-being. Patient "TomServo55" also shows signs of obsession about certain types of Pornography, and odd satanic-style chants.

Experiment Log, Day One

*** TomServo55 (TomServo50@206-39-62.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
Ironf> Hello Mike
TomServo55> Hikeeba
Ironf> Can we help you?
TomServo55> just got bored and decided to stop by
THX-1138> Bored yet?
Balthayzr> Got Bored?
THX-1138> Mr. LAnd? Hello?
THX-1138> We usually don't let people just sit in the room.
TomServo55> Then, a lot of people are getting away with it.
THX-1138> No, just you.
Balthayzr> That happens when you're an Op.
THX-1138> Hello?
THX-1138> You seem distracted.
TomServo55> no
THX-1138> Perhaps you should devote all your attention to whatever it is you are doing.
TomServo55> sitting in here?
THX-1138> See, you took a minute to answer
THX-1138> You're not very devoted
TomServo55> maybe i'm running on a 14.4 modem
Balthayzr> Or a 14.4 neural net.
THX-1138> What does mode speed have to do with chatting?
TomServo55> whats wrong with you people. if you wanna talk, start your own conversation.
THX-1138> What's wrong with you?
THX-1138> you just want to sit in a room?
TomServo55> looks like what your doing too.
THX-1138> If you want to do that, go make your own.
THX-1138> Well, we were having a conversation, then you came in and the good hosts we are, we attended to you.
THX-1138> But you just sat there.
THX-1138> And you still haven't told us what modem speed has to do with chatting.
TomServo55> you "attended" to me? you said "Hello" and then you started pouting about me not saying anything.
TomServo55> I thought the hosts where supposed to keep up the conversation?
TomServo55> Hmmm?
THX-1138> We said hello, then waited for you to respond.
TomServo55> and I said "Hikeeba"
THX-1138> Great for you.
THX-1138> So are you just gonna sit there some more?
TomServo55> yeah 3 Faces of Servo

THX-1138> What a sad life you must live.
Balthayzr> Channel Squatter?
TomServo55> fuck you
THX-1138> To have such free time in one's life to just sit in a room saying nothing. Devoting all his time and attention to just sitting in a chat room.
Ironf> such language
THX-1138> Sounds like a great life plan.
THX-1138> Look who whips the vulgarity card out first.
TomServo55> okay, you wanna know what i'm doing? I'm a software programmer. and I'm working on a chat program much better than mIRC called MSTieChat.
Ironf> sure
THX-1138> I'm sure the world needs something like that.
Ironf> more crap-ware
Balthayzr> Bloat-ware.
TomServo55> i see its that time of the month again for all of you.
THX-1138> Yes, it's that time of the month for me to run scandisk.
Balthayzr> And defragging the HD, that's important, too.
THX-1138> Of course.
Ironf> certainly
THX-1138> I bet MSTieChat would crash a person's computer, like that MSTies Anon web page.
TomServo55> actually, i've got like 11 people in here right now.
THX-1138> I thought you were devoting all your attention to this room.
Balthayzr> You have multiple personalities?
Ironf> 11 different personalities in one head is quite the accomplishment. Huzzah
THX-1138> Delay...delay...delay...delay...
THX-1138> So verbose.
TomServo55> blah you guys suck
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
THX-1138> Yes mt aol user
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
TomServo55> Mybar
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
THX-1138> Ooooo. I'm scared
Balthayzr> My Bar? Is he offering us drinks?
*** TomServo55 (TomServo@206-39-62.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
THX-1138> Hahaha.
TomServo55> bizach
THX-1138> Did you flood yourself off?
THX-1138> That's a shame.
THX-1138> Need some Mylanta?
THX-1138> The trick is to find a balance between talking too much and too little.
THX-1138> You seem to like the extremes.
Ironf> It's a zen like thing
Balthayzr> It could be Zen. Mybar sounds like a chant, of sorts.
Ironf> please chat in the open tom
THX-1138> Is it a candy bar? Or a metal bar? Or a drunk bar?
Ironf> I'm happy you tried to pick me out to dcc chat though. Very thoughtfull
THX-1138> He must love you in that mybar way.
THX-1138> Isn't Mybar the new name for Burma?
TomServo55> you guys are lame
THX-1138> Ouch. That really hurts.
Ironf> Yet you come back from flooding yourself off to tell us that. Isn't that a bit lamer?
Balthayzr> "lame"
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
THX-1138> People who can't walk are lame. So now you have something against cripples?
THX-1138> Ah, could have used some NAM stuff
*** xqivious (JDowner@206-39-62.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
xqivious> Huzzah! Whats up?
Ironf> Welcome back Tom
Ironf> Why the nick change?
THX-1138> Tee hee
*** xqivious has quit IRC ((signed off))
Balthayzr> Heh.
THX-1138> It's loonie
Balthayzr> "That wasn't me! It was my sister!"
THX-1138> brb
*** THX-1138 has quit IRC ((signed off))
*** MSTRulz (MST3k000@p96.amax2.dialup.ftw1.flash.net) has joined #ForeverMST3K
*** THX-1138 (RodVailwood@iras-1-6.ucdavis.edu) has joined #forevermst3k
* MSTRulz slaps THX-1138 around a bit with a large trout
* MSTRulz slaps MSTRulz around a bit with a large trout
MSTRulz> How do you work this M.I.R.C. thing?
* Balthayzr slaps MSTRulz around a bit with a copy of Dianetics.
* Ironf gets Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Black Samson to double team MSTRulz, HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
THX-1138> I don't know. I use MSTieChat
MSTRulz> Whats that?
Ironf> the newest in crap-ware
Balthayzr> It's the latest in chat software. We're beta testing it.
THX-1138> And it really sucks.
MSTRulz> Oh.
THX-1138> Yeah, some goofball gave it to us.
THX-1138> Said it would be better than any other chat program
Ironf> He chose...poorly
Balthayzr> Bloody Bloatware, that's what it is.
Balthayzr> Damn thing is like 20 megs compressed!
Ironf> imagine the poor suckers still on 28.8
THX-1138> I hear some retards are still on 14.4
MSTRulz> I just got a 56 k
THX-1138> I've heard of people getting 56k modems but only having 14.4 connections
THX-1138> Talk about a waste
MSTRulz> I think it has to do with the phone line.
THX-1138> Yeah, lots of people are still using string for their phone lines
MSTRulz> Hmmm...You guys seem like a bunch of posers...See ya. I bet theres other people to talk to. Like the dead.
*** MSTRulz has quit IRC ((signed off))
THX-1138> "posers"
* Balthayzr poses.
* Ironf vouges
*** TomServo55 (TomServo50@201-195-11.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
THX-1138> Hahaha.
TomServo55> you guys are such morons
TomServo55> MSTRulz
Ironf> yes, string boy
THX-1138> What about her?
THX-1138> delay...delay...delay...delay
Balthayzr> Gee. could that be why we teased MSTRulz about Mstiechat?
Ironf> Why do you think we mocked mstiechat retard?
Ironf> delay...delay...delay...delay
THX-1138> I think TomServo55 is a moronic poser.
Balthayzr> I think we broke him.
Balthayzr> Or, it takes him this long to type in his wittisisms with one hand.
Balthayzr> "lame" "poser"
Balthayzr> "bizach"
Balthayzr> Get with the program, Mr. Land.
THX-1138> Mr. Land is really Mike Rallllllz.
Balthayzr> What up, holmes?
THX-1138> I bet he's confering with the 11 other personalities
Ironf> Maybe he's busy gettin' jiggy wit it while looking at porn
THX-1138> Did you buy plastic covers for your keyboard and monitor?
Balthayzr> Is your computer's name Monica?
TomServo55> is your mom's name monica?
THX-1138> Did you buy the special "sex addict" port?
Balthayzr> A mom joke! I haven't heard one of those in months!
THX-1138> He's pushing limits of creativity. I bet that zapped his brain power good.
Balthayzr> If it helps you get off: yes, all our mom's are named Monica.
TomServo55> considering your mom wont let you outside
Balthayzr> Spoken like a true 35 year old living in his parents basement.
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
Balthayzr> Boy is expressing his every thought, there.
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
TomServo55>
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
Ironf> WOW!
Balthayzr> Must remember to report his channel abuse to Abuse@aol.com
THX-1138> That takes skillllz.
Balthayzr> Nuts!
Balthayzr> Thanks for clearing my screen off, Tom.
THX-1138> He should pop back in
Ironf> they always do

Experiment Log, Day Two

*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has joined #forevermst3k
Ironf> Howdy!
TomServo55> hikeeba
Ironf> Seems that Mstiecrapchat doesn't have a very stable connection. You keep popping in and out
THX-1183> Naw, he's just getting his kiddie porn and beastiality.
TomServo55> gee, you would think i meant to get away from you
Ironf> Well it's either bad programming or you feel you need to run away. Whichever you want to blame
TomServo55> i have to run away from your smell
*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has left #forevermst3k
*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has joined #forevermst3k
Ironf> Still working on the bugs in that, huh
TomServo55> why you guys gotta act like such jerks? what'd i do to you?
THX-1183> Does the high volume of kiddie porn your download make your MSTieChat program crash?
THX-1183> Hey, you called us posers.
TomServo55> i dont download kiddie porn
THX-1183> And morons.
Ironf> Little FREE hint. If you don't like the way people are acting in an irc channel, don't keep going back to it.
THX-1183> So you get all your kiddie porn from mail order.
TomServo55> maybe i like coming in here and talking to people who actually talk about whats on the topic. like MST3K.
Ironf> well you see that we are the only two here, so that argument is null
THX-1183> And that has happened so many times in here, right?
TomServo55> not about THX's obsession with kiddie porn
THX-1183> Hey, I'm not the one who gets kiddie porn from mail order.
TomServo55> nether am i ServoWindows

Ironf> you're the one that gets it mail order
Ironf> ahh personal door to door delivery
TomServo55> no i dont, THX is the one who keeps bringing the subject up.
Ironf> sure he is
Ironf> That's denile slipping in.
THX-1183> I bring it up only because I find people like you who are kiddie porn addicts disgusting
TomServo55> look at the first thing THX said to me when i walked in..."Does the high volume of kiddie porn your download make your MSTieChat program crash?"
TomServo55> gee, looks like you brought it up.
Ironf> And you should have an answer through your beta testing.
THX-1183> I brought it up because you brought it up last night.
THX-1183> I was merely continuing the conversation.
Ironf> So, does it crash it?
TomServo55> no, i said i dont like kiddie porn. GET THAT THROUGH YOUR FAT-ASS HEAD!
Ironf> Simply answer my question. Does high volume kiddie porn downloading cause your Mstiechat program to crash?
THX-1183> Well, most people don't like going to the dentist, but they still go. You don't like kiddie porn, but you're mentally ill and you can't draw yourself away from it. It's alright. You can open up in here and admit it.
THX-1183> It's the first step to getting the proper help
TomServo55> I dont download kiddie porn, and i dont like it
Ironf> I didn't ask that. I asked if the downloading of it crashed the program.
THX-1183> Do you go to your local school and take photos of the little kids instead of downloading it?
TomServo55> i dont download it, and mstchat doesnt crash
THX-1183> Then it slows it down.
TomServo55> i dont downlaod it
TomServo55> moron
Ironf> I bet it has some serious lag time then.
TomServo55> not any more than mirc
THX-1183> But you do get it mail order and take photos of the little school kids.
TomServo55> do you know how old i am? i'm 13, if i was looking at kiddi porn (and i'm not) then i would be the kiddie porn. but i'm not.
Ironf> So you agree that when you download your kiddie porn, there is some lag. Thanks for finally opening up to us truthfully.
Ironf> you say you're 13 just so you can get the little girls to chat with you. That's just sad.
TomServo55> i dont downlaod kiddie porn, i dont like it, and i dont look at it.
THX-1183> Wait, you take photos of yourself and sell them to pedophiles?
THX-1183> That's even worse.
TomServo55> no
THX-1183> I can't believe you would prostitute yourself.
TomServo55> i have nothing to do with kiddie porn
THX-1183> You said you would be the kiddie porn.
Ironf> what is it you like, the hairlessness?
THX-1183> Do you like it when pedophiles look at you?
THX-1183> That's disgusting.
THX-1183> It's also very dangerous
Ironf> I've always wondered, what does that pay, 1, 2 lollypops a day?
THX-1183> How much fan mail do you get from pedophiles?
TomServo55> okay...I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH KIDDIE PORN
THX-1183> You have nothing to do with kiddie porn yet you take photos of yourself to sell to pedophiles?
TomServo55> no
THX-1183> You're really at the center of it all. You're feeding the monster.
THX-1183> That is soooo disgusting.
THX-1183> How do you lie with yourself.
THX-1183> Do your parents know about that?
Ironf> But you agreed that there was some lag when downloading massive amounts of kiddie porn when also using your mstiechat program. you said "
TomServo55> not any more than mirc" Showing that you've done it with both, so you can do comparison.
Ironf> you really make me sick. I wish you'd leave our channel.
THX-1183> And never come back.
THX-1183> I get sick just by looking at your nick.
*** THX-1183 changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html Kestrel whimps out and retreats to her fantasy world...again and TomServo55 enjoys kiddie porn.'
Ironf> you know. It's sad to say but Carpenter's commentary really isn't all that great on Vampires
THX-1183> Same goes for the Austin Powers commentary.
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has joined #foreverMST3K
*** THX-1183 changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html Kestrel whimps out and retreats to her fantasy world...again and TomServo55 enjoys kiddie porn.'
Ironf> Kiddie porn boy, please leave
THX-1183> He must be busy doing more kiddie porn stuff
TomServo55>
*** TomServo55 changes topic to THX-1183 enjoys kiddie porn.'
TomServo55> blah
TomServo55> you guys suck dick
Ironf> you're the one doing kiddie porn
Ironf> so maybe you do
*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has left #foreverMST3K
THX-1183> Yeah, niec topic change. Too bad it ain't real
*** TomServo55 (Tomservo50@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has joined #forevermst3k
THX-1183> Is he kicking his ASS!
Ironf> Good lord, why do you continually bring your filth back to us?
THX-1183> We don't want your kddie porn!
*** ArchMageK (ArchMageK@slip-32-101-23-17.wa.us.ibm.net) has joined #forevermst3k
ArchMageK> What the hell is going on
TomServo55> Hey arch
ArchMageK> whats up
Ironf> Questions?
TomServo55> THX and ironf are the assnuts
Ironf> "assnuts"
TomServo55> they think i do kiddie porn
THX-1183> You do. You said you do
Ironf> you said so.
TomServo55> no i dont i've told you thousands of times, i dont do kiddie porn
Ironf> You even said you download massive amounts of it
ArchMageK> jesus fucking christ with the cross he was nailed to up the asshole, are you some sick ass pervert that needs his ass kick ironf?
Ironf> Hey, don't sing it, bring it.
ArchMageK> fucking cock sucking faggot lookin at naked kids
ArchMageK> thats sick
THX-1183> Yeah, TomServo55 is nasty.
Ironf> Good to see you agree.
ArchMageK> i belive you are the ones that gave him the address
TomServo55> I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN, GET THAT THROUGH YOUR FAT HEAD!
THX-1183> You said the high volume of kiddie porn you download slows your chat program
ArchMageK> chuckle
TomServo55> I didnt say that
TomServo55> you said that
Ironf> Arch, he actually told us that when he downloads large amounts of kiddie porn, it causes his Mstie-chat program to start to lag.
ArchMageK> ironf do you have AOL?
Ironf> I asked you if it did, and you said no more than on MIRC.
Ironf> no, I use a local service.
ArchMageK> oh
TomServo55> ass.net
ArchMageK> so your some kinda childmolestor?
Ironf> TomServo is the pedoist on AOL
THX-1183>
Ironf> I bet it has some serious lag time then.
THX-1183>
TomServo55> not any more than mirc
THX-1183> You did a comparison obviouslly between the two.
Ironf> I don't look, nor participate with that activity. We were trying to get Tomservo to leave because we don't believe in his filth.
TomServo55> how stupid do ya gotta be, THX, ironf?
THX-1183> I find kiddie porn disgusting. That is why we take such ofense to TomServo55.
Ironf> Hey, we are just going by what you told us dude.
ArchMageK> well ill tell you what...if you were telling tom to look at kiddy porn, then what the hell is wrong with you...do you know he is 11 years old?
TomServo55> why? i dont look at kiddie porn, and i dont like it.
THX-1183> We didn't tell him to look at it.
THX-1183> He said he does it already.
TomServo55> 12 now, archmage, :D
Ironf> "
TomServo55>i would be the kiddie porn" Direct quote
TomServo55> you left part of that out
TomServo55> a lot of that
Ironf> We didn't tell him to look at it. We told him not to. That's rather sick, we feel. But he likes to flaunt the fact that he poses for stuff like that.
THX-1183> But you did say that.
TomServo55> i said..."If i was looking at kiddie porn (and i'm not) then i would be the kiddie porn, couse i'm only 12. but i'm not"
THX-1183> So you've thought about modelling for pedophiles?
TomServo55> no
ArchMageK> Oh my god
Ironf> problems?
ArchMageK> Yah mother fucker why do you think your hot shit?
TomServo55> we've been in this argument for 24 hours! stop the hell tellin people i look at kiddie porn!
Ironf> now you see how totally sick and twisted he really is.
THX-1183> We don't tell people.
THX-1183> You keep coming in this room.
THX-1183> And you keep trying to foist your kiddie porn ways upon us.
TomServo55> why was the topic of this room "TomServo55 enjoys kiddie porn" then?
Ironf> You seem to find a way to bring it up to folks. I guess you're trolling for new customers or something. I don't really care. We just want you to leave your filth out of our channel.
THX-1183> Was it? Must have been a misprint.
TomServo55> bs
Ironf> Do you have a log of that, cause i don't think it was.
THX-1183> That or we were trying to warn others of your dangerous kiddie porn addiction.
ArchMageK> Now now, we know you had sex with your mother when you were 14 but you dont have to take your agression out of everyone..
*** SirBongAlot (SirBongAlot@con1-147.montana.com) has joined #forevermst3k
TomServo55>
*** Topic is 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html Kestrel whimps out and retreats to her fantasy world...again and TomServo55 enjoys kiddie porn
Ironf> Ahh I see what's going on now. Since we are warning people about his practices, he's afraid that he's gonna lose customers.
Ironf> yeah nice try. You just typed all that out.
THX-1183> Yeah, most likely.
TomServo55> bs
SirBongAlot> Hello people.
Ironf> Hello, Sir
SirBongAlot> Whats new tonite?
THX-1183> I don't see the topic saying you are a kiddie porn addict TomServo55
THX-1183> But if you want to make a topic like that to advertise your addiction, you're free to do so.
TomServo55> watch out THX and ironf think everyone does kiddie porn just couse they do.
ArchMageK> How old are you THX and Ironf
ArchMageK> ??
ArchMageK> 10
Ironf> Dude, as we've told you. We don't believe in that sort of thing. You're the one that was fausting it off on us.
ArchMageK> 11
ArchMageK> ?
THX-1183> See, he's trying to discredit us because he doesn't want to lose kiddie porn customers.
SirBongAlot> I've never seen one kiddie porn site.
THX-1183> Neither have I.
TomServo55> as i've told you, i dont like kiddie porn and i have nothing to do with it
SirBongAlot> Sure.
Ironf> Good for you. That's the way America should be, but sickos like TomServo have to screw that all up.
THX-1183> Servo, we told you we don't want your nasty products and to just leave. Why do you keep coming back? Go look for new customers elsewhere, please.
ArchMageK> yah i guess tomservo is pretty sick huh?
TomServo55> you guys are full of shiznit
SirBongAlot> Why don't you just boot him?
THX-1183> We never told you to leave?
THX-1183> We are polite, that is why.
SirBongAlot> I see..
TomServo55> lol, yeah uh-huh
Ironf> See the language he has to resort to. We've never even said anything like that to him, but that's the way kids are today I guess.
THX-1183> While we dislike his addiction to kiddie porn, we respect the fact he has the right to download all the kiddie porn he wants.
SirBongAlot> Anyway, any new info about the show? I havent been on for awhile.
TomServo55> you guys have to leave sometime, when you doi'll ban you
ArchMageK> show?
Ironf> We just don't want him bringing his filth into our channels
SirBongAlot> MST.
ArchMageK> i dont even know what the hell is going on
ArchMageK> what the hell is MST
Ironf> Mystery Science Theater 3000
ArchMageK> Oh
SirBongAlot> Mystery Science Theater. Hello?
ArchMageK> HAHAHAHA
TomServo55> this is supposed to be a room to talk about a TV show, but THX and ironf are kiddie porn addicts
SirBongAlot> Sigh.
ArchMageK> I HATE THAT, THE DAMN IDIOTS KEEP TALKING THROUGHOUT THE MOVIE AND YOU CANT WATCH IT!
SirBongAlot> Thats the idea.
Ironf> Yes quite a lot of projected anger from TomServo
THX-1183> See, we're fans of the show SirBongAlot, but these "invaders" come in here to sell their kiddie porn.
SirBongAlot> Take a stupid movie, and trash it.
TomServo55> THX, I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH KIDDIE PORN!
Ironf> It's sad that people can't just leave other people alone.
SirBongAlot> I know, THX.
SirBongAlot> By the way, cool nick, THX-1183.
THX-1183> Tell me about it. We're here to try and save the show, and these non-fans come in here and start going off about kiddie porn. It's disgusting.
TomServo55> your the ont who brings up kiddie porn
TomServo55> one
THX-1183> Um, why would we bring it up when we're here to save MST.
THX-1183> You're the one who came in here.
*** ArchMageK has quit IRC ((signed off))
TomServo55> gee what was the first thing you said to me when i came in here? hmmm...could it have been ummm..."Howdy TomServo55, got any more porn for us?"
Ironf> We're just here to let people know the newest news on what to do to help the show.
THX-1183> We never said that.
SirBongAlot> What is the newest news, anyway?
Ironf> I'm sure anyone here can tell that you just typed that in. You are so pathetic.
THX-1183> The Brains still want us to hold off on letters.
THX-1183> They want us instead to get as many people as we can to watch the new eps.
Ironf> Sir, you should get everyone to watch the show, especially the new season.
SirBongAlot> Yeah, i suppose that would get old...getting bombarded with letters.
Ironf> Do you know of anyone with a neilson box, or log book?
SirBongAlot> Way ahead of you, Ironf. All my friends watch it whether they like it or not.
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THX-1183> There's also talk on the HomeGame of starting up a special ad.
Ironf> That's great, but what you really need is people that have to keep the log book or have the box. Those are the only ones that really count.
SirBongAlot> Yeah, thats true.
Ironf> bmm.interspeed.net/HG/gravy.htm it's linked at the top of thier page.
SirBongAlot> Even though it makes me sad, I really think that it
THX-1183> Yeah, they're really going to try and save the show.
TomServo55> THX, I have nothing to do with kiddie porn, why cant you get that through your head?
THX-1183> What?
SirBongAlot> is to late to save the show.
THX-1183> I never said anything about kiddie porn. I've been talking about MST.
SirBongAlot> oops.
THX-1183> Listen, we don't want your kiddie porn.
Ironf> along with the "save mst again" page by James Plummer, the guy that was the hub of the last campaign that worked
TomServo55> you are so full of shit, THX
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SirBongAlot> Anyway, i think it's to late to save the show.....unless TNT picks it up, which is a possibility.
Ironf> See Sir, we were talking to you totally about mst and he starts in with the kiddie porn shit. You saw that didn't you?
THX-1183> Yeah, James Plummer had this webapge the 1st time it was cancelled and he had so much TV coverage and stuff that it really helped..
SirBongAlot> Yeah, he seems to be unintelligent, Ironf.
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THX-1183> I think I'll go and take the dog out for a walk.
TomServo55> arch, your back
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THX-1138> Look at that, TomServo is back.
THX-1138> He just can't get enough.
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ArchMaGeK> Hey
ArchMaGeK> god damn
ArchMaGeK> this server sucks
ArchMaGeK> someone answer
Ironf> yes it does.
TomServo55> hey
ArchMaGeK> alright
ArchMaGeK> so ironf you a hacker eh?
Ironf> no, I'm not.
THX-1138> This room is for discussing MST.
TomServo55> howd you boot the other host off and take over?
Ironf> what other host?
ArchMaGeK> alright here...
TomServo55> i dont remember
TomServo55> you had like IRC back orifice or some crap like that
Ironf> We used no underground means to become the new ops of this channel.
THX-1138> Back orifice?
THX-1138> We told you we don't want your nasty porn
Ironf> I guess the old one's just didn't want the channel any more. So we agreed to host it to tell people what's up with the campaign.
ArchMaGeK> Ok lets talk about MST!
ArchMaGeK> WOOO!
Ironf> Do you have a particular question about the campaign?
TomServo55> no
*** Ironf sets mode: +o THX-1138
ArchMaGeK> you wanna bring MST back or something?
Ironf> Well that's what this channel is for. For general mst chat, I'd try another channel
Ironf> Well it's been done once before, so couldn't hurt to try again.
TomServo55> but, i do want to know why youve all of a sudden stope telling people i took nude pictures of children at the local school? I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN, AND I DONT LIKE IT.
TomServo55> stoped
Ironf> See we're here trying to stay on topic and you start with the porn stuff again.
THX-1138> Why are you fixated on kiddie porn?
ArchMaGeK> i once had sex with this girl in the bathroom at my school....she was my age though
* TomServo55 slaps Ironf around a bit with a large trout
Ironf> Well good for you, but we don't really care to hear about it. That's not the focus of this chat channel.
THX-1138> If you want to talk about that type of thing, please retreat to another room with TomServo55
TomServo55> bs
ArchMaGeK> hay fuck you if your calling me a fag
TomServo55> just before everyone got in here, the topic was 'TomServo55 enjoys kiddie porn' what? you too scared to fight now that we have a crowd?
THX-1138> Do you see the channel name? The channel topic? It doesn't say we want to talk about sexual experiences in bathrooms or kiddie porn.
ArchMaGeK> well atleast i got some
THX-1138> We are here to discuss MST. Please see to it you stay on topic.
ArchMaGeK> Ok
ArchMaGeK> lets discuss i
ArchMaGeK> t
Ironf> No, it's just that we are getting tired of your continual chatting about kiddie porn.
Ironf> Well what would you like to know about the campaign?
ArchMaGeK> its the biggest fucking waste of time show ive ever seen, i havent efven gotten through 20 min of it without changing the channel because of how much it sucked ass, fuck you and goodnight!
*** ArchMaGeK has quit IRC ((signed off))
THX-1138> Perhaps you have a low intellect and short attention span
THX-1138> Yes, make a comment like that and then run away.
THX-1138> Very good.
Ironf> Good to see he has to run after telling someone that. Shows that he really is some sort of limp wrist
Ironf> We really need to get over our good naturedness and start kicking people instead of continually giving them another chance. Ya know.
darkism> jesus
darkism> that guy needs help
darkism> "i think that guy needs an anti-spazmotic" - crow
darkism> :)
THX-1138> Can you blieve making such a comment only to quit.
THX-1138> He didn't even have the balls to defend his argument.
Ironf> I'm glad that others can so readibly see that. Shows we aren't over-reacting
TomServo55> that guy was trying to help me..thx and irony here are trying to force the'ir pedophile ways onto me
THX-1138> Help you...right.
THX-1138> He didn't even like MST and I don't know why you would need help.
Ironf> I'm sorry, but I've had enough. One more mention of your kiddie porn ways and I'll be forced to kick you. That's fair warning.
THX-1138> Unless you ran out of meds.
TomServo55> go ahead
darkism> uh
darkism> 55
darkism> i don't think any of these people are pedophiles
Ironf> Oh I don't intend to kick you out of spite. Just if you mention your "hobby" again.
TomServo55> why did they talk about kiddie porn for 45 minutes last night, then turn on me
TomServo55> SEE!
darkism> WHOA!
*** TomServo55 was kicked by Ironf (I warned you.)
darkism> that had two meanings!
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THX-1138> These people.
Ironf> wouldn't you agree that I gave him fair warning.
THX-1138> Yes.
crazya> If Best Brains were to send: a card, some flowers, a epossode guide a greatest hits tape and a box of ritz crackers and a can of cheez wiz to bonnie schanuser or whatever her name is maybe she would change her mid
THX-1138> Frankly, I'm sick and tired of his kiddie porn discussions
crazya> i mean mind
Ironf> They say she's pretty set in her ways Crazya
Ironf> But the best thing to do now if get all your friends to watch the season opener. Especially those with neilson boxes or log books.
THX-1138> We should send her a copy of that garbage software MSTieChat and see if she can at least talk to us.
Ironf> That was real trash.
Ironf> I think that'd only piss her off even more.
darkism> hey hey HEY!
darkism> i was the HEAD CODER of MSTie Chat
Ironf> That's a shame.
THX-1138> Too bad. Someone must have re-coded it then.
darkism> you mean decompiled it and made it crappy?
Ironf> Tomservo55 told us he was the head coder last night. I guess he's stealing all your credit.
darkism> well
darkism> it was his idea
Ironf> actually he said programmer
crazya> The show never was sinking to begin w/ sfc is pushing it under
darkism> i did a lot of the coding
darkism> hence the "MSTie Chat by Mike Land and Dark Knight"
THX-1138> He said he was a software programmer and he was working all night on coding it.
Ironf> Maybe that's why he's under so much stress. He's afraid you'll find out about it and get pissed.

Experiment Log, Day Three

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TomServo55> Hikeeba, all
THX-1138> Yes?
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Balthayzr> Can we help you, flooder-boy?
Balthayzr> Speaking of, I got a letter from Abuse@aol.com about a half-hour ago. Looks like someone's gonna get their hands slapped.
THX-1138> Uh-oh.
TomServo55> uh-huh
Balthayzr> They frown on people who launch Denial-of-Service attacks.
TomServo55> lol
Balthayzr> Too bad they don't punish people for excessive use of "lol".
TomServo55> lol
TomServo55> Balth, do you have AOL?
Balthayzr> Of course not.
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TomServo55> then the people at Abuse@aol.com wont give a shit or belive anything you say if you e-mail them.
Balthayzr> Wanna bet?
Ironf> sure they won't.
Balthayzr> That's what the Abuse mailbox is for, goof.
Ironf> I TOTALLY believe that. 100%
TomServo55> uh-huh and they reply to people that dont use the'ir service
TomServo55> fwd me the e-mail
TomServo55> and i'll belive you
THX-1138> Of course they reply to other people. They want to seem like they have good service in hopes of winning you over
Balthayzr> Why? you'll just say I forged the e-mail. And, I really don't give the proverbial Rodents hindquarters if you believe me or not.
TomServo55> but you gotta have a disk for the service. they dont know your snail mail addy
TomServo55> sure, you didnt get a reply nor even send a letter
Ironf> yes he can forward the mail to you so you have his headers to forge hate mail so you have an excuse
Balthayzr> Oh, you caught me, Tom. I lie to everyone who comes in hee and floods the channel. My life is so empty, I have to make up exciting adventures like reporting channel abuse.
Ironf> yes, you can't sign up over the net and download the software. Not at all. NOT AT ALL.
Balthayzr> Please play along. Don't rob me of my rich fantasy life.
TomServo55> I wont.
TomServo55> You can stay in moron-land
Ironf> It's all he has. That and the whore he keeps in the basement
Balthayzr> Wow, an invite from the King!
Balthayzr> "moron-land"
TomServo55> yes...you will be knighted
TomServo55> cant think up a snappy remark?
Balthayzr> Why? You haven't come up with one yet.
Balthayzr> WHy should it always be my turn?
Balthayzr> Aren't you overdue to pop out of the channel and come back in with a clever new nickname?
TomServo55> oh yeah thanks
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Balthayzr> Told you he was trouble, Miss.
DarkMaiden> yes you did
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balthironfthxaregaybuddys> good enough?
Balthayzr> Oh, for pete's sakes. i said a clever one!
THX-1138> Do you know the meaning of clever?
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Balthayzr> Not one of your sick fantasies!
* Balthayzr checks his watch.
Balthayzr> How long does it take to type in "IamALoSer" anyways?
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BALTHTHXANDIRONFENJOYKIDDIEPOR> ?
BALTHTHXANDIRONFENJOYKIDDIEPOR> hmm...forgot the N
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Ironf> You know I like Kiddie Por.
Ironf> Good fun ServoServoServo

Balthayzr> KiddiePor? That new soft drink?
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BALTHTHXANDIRONFENJOYKIDDIEPOR> hmm
Balthayzr> Nice spelling.
BALTHTHXANDIRONFENJOYKIDDIEPOR> guess it wont
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Balthayzr> He's just upset that we yelled at him about those disgusting pictures, before.
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BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> there ya go
THX-1138> You are such a moron.
Balthayzr> Nope. Still not the least bit clever.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> I thought I already used that one on you?
Balthayzr> And, your Homophobia is showing.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> Oh well. Who's to tell me whats clever or not. your the one who always talks about kiddie porn
Balthayzr> Only because sickos like you keep sending it out. Get a clue.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> i have nothing to do with kiddie porn
Balthayzr> That's what you tell AOL's Abuse Dept?
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> Thats what i tell everyone. couse its true
Balthayzr> Better come up with a better cover story than that.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> its better than you trying to pin your addiction on me
THX-1138> Dude, we don't want your kiddie porn!
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> yeah, ironf we dont want it!
Balthayzr> Nice try, sicko. Blaming others for your mistakes don't wash here.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> thats what you do
Ironf> Don't project your faults onto me.
Balthayzr> BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> thats what you do - the height of humor.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> you've already projected your kiddie porn addiction on me
Plumm> you have a kiddie porn addiction?
Balthayzr> Tom, Tom, Tom. Seek help. Projection onto others is the surest sign of Addiction.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> Yes, ironf and THX sell it
Plumm> And you're their top customer?
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> Nope
Ironf> yes, that coming from someone with your nick is so convincing.
BALTHTHXIRONGAY4LIFE> i have nothing to do with kiddie porn
Balthayzr> Of course you don't.
Balthayzr> Keep telling yourself that.
Balthayzr> it's the first step to curing your addiction.
* Balthayzr awaits more Tom Servo55 "wit".
Balthayzr> And waits.
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Balthayzr> Haven't had any so far, so it's been a long wait.
Ironf> wit is one way to spell it I guess
Balthayzr> Wonder what the new name will be?
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DarkMaiden> same one
DarkMaiden> awe thats a shame
THX-1138> That's actaully funnier than the last ones
Balthayzr> Mike Land? That's the goofiest one of all!
THX-1138> Mike Land the plane
Balthayzr> Mike Land. Where we sell microphones of all shapes and sizes. Free balloons for the kids.
Balthayzr> I see Tom has started his own channel. Wonder what witty saying will be the topic?
Balthayzr> After all, #blah is one wacky channel name.
Ironf> you misspelt that again Balth
Balthayzr> Tom? You hurt yourself, old buddy?
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Balthayzr> Oh, wait, I know. This is the old "If i'm quiet, they'll stop picking on me" bit.
* THX-1138 slices open TomServo55 and removes both ovaries. Do I have a God complex? I AM GOD!
Balthayzr> He speaks!
TomServo55> your gay!
Balthayzr> "your gay" Not only ungrammatical, but not funny.
TomServo55> balth, whats your e-mail?
Balthayzr> I don't have email, sorry.
Balthayzr> Why do you wish to know?
Ironf> so he can mail-bomb you
TomServo55> could it be bcm@chicago.il.ameritech.net?
Ironf> that's it.
Ironf> durn he's too smart
Balthayzr> Nope, sorry, nice try, though.
Balthayzr> That's like saying mikeland@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com * Tom Servo is yours.
TomServo55> yeah, but you can downsize that to an addy
Balthayzr> Only if you put your actual email address in your IRC client.
Ironf> Yes, but the part in front can be changed indescriminantly
THX-1138> Only an idiot puts the real email addy in the IRC client
Balthayzr> Why do you ask, Tom? Anything you wish to discuss with me, you can discuss here. I have no secrets from these fine people.
Balthayzr> Tom? Are you mad at me, Tom?
Ironf> He's busy doing a layout.
Balthayzr> You played with all of us so nicely a few minutes ago, Tom. What's up?
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Ironf> ahh enjoy the coming of the new screen-names
Balthayzr> Of, for the love of mike. *That's* what you were doing?
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Ironf> Screen-name boy has arrived!
Balthayzr> I'm honored.
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Balthayzr> No ipt.ironf.com@aol.com? No ipt.THX.com@Aol.com? We don't play favorites.
Ironf> and the halarity ensues
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Ironf> what I want to know is why it takes so long
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Ironf> I guess it's kinda hard to type with a stick that's taped to your head.
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Balthayzr> I dunno. Never been on AOl, so I have no idea how long it takes to set up an second chat account.
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Ironf> I guess he showed you
Balthayzr> May I be so bold as to ask what purpose this is supposed to serve?
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Balthayzr> Guess channel-flooding lost it's appeal.
Balthayzr> Who gets next turn to be immortalized in Servo Chat bot?
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Ironf> ipt, yeah you know me.
Balthayzr> So, Tom, what's your opinion of the recent flucuations in the worth of the Russian Economy?
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Ironf> mstiechat.
Ironf> mstiecrap.
THX-1138> heh.
Balthayzr> Where can I download this MSTieChat? Looks like a blast.
THX-1138> I heard it grows hair
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Balthayzr> Nah, it doesn't grow hair?
Balthayzr> Thanks for the heads-up.
Ironf> mstiechat.
Ironf> meshitcat
Balthayzr> For chatting while in the potty?
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Balthayzr> What, exactly, do these bots do? if you're demonstrating this new software, you need to show *all* its functions.
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Ironf> It's one and only function is logging you off anytime you try to type something stupid
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Balthayzr> Teaching the alphabet? That's a nice feature.
Ironf> see it works
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Ironf> but where is the other har?
TomServo55> blah
TomServo55> so the user box flood doesnt work
THX-1138> Cause it's crap
Ironf> as most other functions probably don't
Balthayzr> Is that what that was? Well, you get a gold star for your efforts.
TomServo55> yeah, someone else made it
THX-1138> And you stole it?
TomServo55> i downloaded it
THX-1138> With the porn?
Balthayzr> So, what exactly does this user box flood do?
TomServo55> nope
Ironf> ahh last night it was "I'm a programmer making mstiechat" tonight it's "someone else made it"
TomServo55> its supposed to put in 50 names to the userbox
TomServo55> its an IRC plugin
THX-1138> Oooo that's so bad.
TomServo55> i can use it in any IRC program
Ironf> that's because this server only allows you three connections at any one time, ray-tard.
THX-1138> What will I ever do with 50 names in the box.
Balthayzr> And, what does putting 50 names in the Userbox do?
TomServo55> i dont know, ask the fucknut that made the program
THX-1138> No. I want to ask the fucknut who's stupid enough to use it
TomServo55> all the 3000 people who visit his website
TomServo55> visited
THX-1138> Oh good. And how many of those are fake users?
*** Ironf sets mode: +l 5
THX-1138> Of which 2920 of those visitors are you.
Balthayzr> You don't know what it does, but you tried to use it? How do you know it doesn't open some kind of back-door in your IRC client, like that script.ini thing did?
TomServo55> .inis are just used to hold program options. like fonts and crap
Balthayzr> Yes, but there was a "fake" Script.ini being passed around IRC servers for a while.
Balthayzr> It was a trojan horse.
THX-1138> Like a program option to give back door access
TomServo55> i scaned it, its clean
TomServo55> w/ 2 scanners
Ironf> it's not a virus
THX-1138> Sure you did. Say that to yourself.
THX-1138> I bet he's trying to run one now.
TomServo55> why dont you get back to your kiddie porn additions
Ironf> it's specifically written to open the backdoor. Look it up at any big irc site.
Balthayzr> Don't you mean, addictions?
TomServo55> no additions to your collection
Balthayzr> Or, are you under the impression we have some sort of naughty flash-cards for math?
*** Ironf sets mode: -l
Balthayzr> I thought you didn't want to discuss kiddie porn any more, Tom? What's up?
TomServo55> the sky
Ironf> old habits die hard I guess
Balthayzr> We tried to help you with your little flood program, even after you tried to use it on us, and what thanks do we get? Sick accusations.
TomServo55> your the ones making sick accusations
Balthayzr> TomServo55> why dont you get back to your kiddie porn additions
Balthayzr> That looks like your handwriting.
TomServo55> I dont have anything to do with kiddi porn
TomServo55> kiddie
Balthayzr> Of course you don't.
TomServo55> see, your agreeing with me
Ironf> when you touch yourself at night, does your daddy's camera go click?
Balthayzr> The same as you saying earlier that you don't flood channels.
TomServo55> Just a minute ago you werent. whats up?
Balthayzr> We believe you, honestly.
Balthayzr> No channel flooding. no porn. You don't need to convince us.
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Balthayzr> Here we go.
Ironf> ohh the magical alt-0160 at the end
*** Ironf sets mode: +l 5
TomServo55> heh
Ironf> and no, we won't see any more
Balthayzr> I feel so guilty. No one else got a flood bot named after him.
THX-1138> (ipt.chicago.il.ameritech.net@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com)
TomServo55> lol
THX-1138> Yeah, that makes so much sense.
THX-1138> What a great program
Balthayzr> I was completely fooled. It was like looking into a mirror.
Ironf> that's gonna "downgrade" to a huge e-mail address
TomServo55> the e-mail addys at scool are 75 chr
Ironf> I'd hate to go to your "scool" cause it's not very good.
Balthayzr> And, I see you're doing well in "scool".
THX-1138> Do you mean Skoal?
Balthayzr> Oh, Chewing tobacco is bad, mmmmkay?
Balthayzr> What other wonders does this MSTieChat produce?
Ironf> It automatically filters your input to leave only the most retarded remains.
Balthayzr> And, how does Tom know when this works?
Ironf> and it 'korects' spelling on it's own
TomServo55> id-net.fr #deep13
Balthayzr> Uh huh. And, what's that?
TomServo55> server/room of mstiechat
Ironf> I knew the French were involved somehow.
Balthayzr> I'll be sure to run right over and fetch it.
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
*** Ironf sets mode: +l 4
Balthayzr> Cheesus H. Tap-dancing Christ, the emptyness of that idiots head could suck the air out of a domed stadium.
Balthayzr> I'm still trying to figure out just what putting 50 extra names in the userbox does.
Ironf> wastes time
Balthayzr> I've been in chat rooms with a couple hundred people, so it's not like there's a limit...
Ironf> and gives him someone that might actually talk to him
Balthayzr> On his level.
THX-1138> Nothing like bantering with one's own self. It's like "intellectual" masturbation
Ironf> and his hand still falls asleep
*** TomServo55 (mikeland@201-1-245.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
THX-1138> Hey, loser!
*** Ironf sets mode: +o Ironf
TomServo55> Hey, gaywad!
Balthayzr> Gaywad? Oh, c'mon, you can do better than that!
THX-1138> Gaywad? Are you using some mad-libs vulgarity program?
TomServo55> stupid moronic dumbass mother fucker
*** TomServo55 was kicked by Ironf (what a sad, sad, little, lonely boy you must be.)

IN PRIVATE MESSAGE
Ironf> TomSrvo43> wussy
Ironf> Ironf> Don't sing it, just bring it.
Ironf> TomSrvo43> un ban me
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
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Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"
Ironf> TomSrvo43> delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay
...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay...delay"

*** TomSrvo43 (blah@p247.amax5.dialup.ftw1.flash.net) has joined #ForeverMST3K
TomSrvo43> ;]
*** TomSrvo43 has quit IRC ((signed off))
*** TomServo55 (blah@p247.amax5.dialup.ftw1.flash.net) has joined #ForeverMST3K
TomServo55> ;]
Balthayzr> Another account? How clever!!
THX-1138> Hey loser.
TomServo55> it was a nice try to ban me...really.
Balthayzr> Uh, this server doesn't accept ban commands.
THX-1138> Why would we want to ban you. You're so stupid it's fun
Balthayzr> Just the automatic 5-minute one you get when booted from a channel.
THX-1138> Don't you know that ray-tard.
Balthayzr> So, what can we do for you?
TomServo55> what happa to irony?
TomServo55> you can fuck off
THX-1138> He went to call the FBI
-> [TomServo55] FINGER
Balthayzr> Such language. You kiss your mother with that dirty mouth?
TomServo55> uh-huh, and report his little kitty got stuck in a tree?
THX-1138> No. He was logging all of this and he's going to report you.
TomServo55> uh-huh
THX-1138> You know that IlluminatiMan? He was FBI
TomServo55> and they're gonna arrest a 12 year old
THX-1138> Hey, they do it to hackers.
TomServo55> i'm not a hacker
Balthayzr> 12? I gave you *much* too much credit.
TomServo55> i'm a software programmer. thats as close as it gets
THX-1138> Doesn't matter. You committed a computer crime.
* Balthayzr falls down laughing.
Balthayzr> Programmer???
THX-1138> Trying to get kiddie porn is a felony
Balthayzr> Is that little flood program of your an example of your Programing Skills?
Balthayzr> Or that clever-beyond-words-delay......delay....delay bit?
TomServo55> i wasnt trying to get kiddie porn
TomServo55> and i never was
TomServo55> and i dont like kiddie porn
Balthayzr> Of course you weren't.
Balthayzr> And you don't flood channels, either.
THX-1138> That's not what you said last night
Plumm> all right, I have to go mail all that kiddie porn to tomservo55 and then get some sleep
Plumm> good night
*** Plumm has quit IRC ((signed off))
Balthayzr> Nite.
Balthayzr> See?
THX-1138> Oh my god! You're kiddie porn!
Balthayzr> Why do all these people talk about you and Kiddie porn in the same sentence, if you don't do it?
THX-1138> You take photos of yourself?
TomServo55> becouse you tell people that i do kiddie porn. and i dont
Balthayzr> I never mentioned it to that Plumm guy.
THX-1138> Who did I tell?
TomServo55> bs
THX-1138> Who's that?
Balthayzr> Bob Serrot?
THX-1138> Bob Sagat?
Balthayzr> Barney Sascatuan?
*** TomServo54 (blah@213-216-50.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
THX-1138> Bob Sacamano?
*** TomServo55 has quit IRC ((signed off))
*** TomServo54 has quit IRC ((signed off))
Balthayzr> What, does using 2 connections double the rate you concoct your little floodbots?
*** TomServo55 (TomServo50@213-216-50.ipt.aol.com) has joined #ForeverMST3K
Balthayzr> OK, you switched back to AOL. Now, what?
THX-1138> Do you use 2 accounts so it's easier for your porn
Balthayzr> Would double the delivery channels, I guess.
TomServo55> I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN! AND DONT SAY SOME SARCASTIC CRAP LIKE "SURE YOU DONT" I"M GETTING EALLY SICK OF YOU PEOPLE!
THX-1138> Is one account for sending and the other receiving
THX-1138> That's why you keep coming in here.
Balthayzr> Of course. We wouldn't dream of it. Calm down.
Balthayzr> You'll bust an artery screaming like that.
TomServo55> WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? WHY DO YOU THINK I'M DOING KIDDIE PORN!? I'M NOT!
Balthayzr> Stop yelling. it makes you look guilty.
THX-1138> He is guilty.
THX-1138> Guilty of kiddie porn addiction!
TomServo55> I DONT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH PORN! I'M SURE YOU TWO ARE PERFECTLY NICE PEOPLE, BUT I DONT DO THAT STUFF!
THX-1138> Sure you do. You love it. You know you do.
TomServo55> NO I DONT!
Balthayzr> We believe you, Tom. We surely do.
Balthayzr> And stop yelling.
TomServo55> STOP SAYING THAT!
THX-1138> How much kiddie porn do you download in one day?
TomServo55> YOU STOP ACCUSING ME OF DOING KIDDIE PORN
TomServo55> I NEVER DOWNLOAD ANY KIDDIE PORN
Balthayzr> Of course not.
TomServo55> SHUT UP!
Balthayzr> Tom, Tom,Tom, you've got to move beyond this.
THX-1138> I sense there are bigger problems than your kiddie porn addiction
TomServo55> I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN! GET THAT THROUG YOUR HEAD! I DONT KNOW WHY YOU THINK I DO! BUT I JUST CAME IN HERE TO TALK LAST NIGHT AND YOU START ACCUSING ME OF THAT STUFF!
THX-1138> I think the addiction is a symptom of something bigger.
Balthayzr> Imagine the nerve this hit, for him to go on and on about it this much.
TomServo55> WILL YOU STOP SAYING THAT SHIT!
Balthayzr> But, I'm willing to give him the benifit of the doubt. I believe you, Tom.
THX-1138> Perhaps he sufferes from an inappropriate love for his mother
TomServo55> I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN, GOD DAMNIT!
Balthayzr> I said I believed you, Tom. What else do you want?
THX-1138> Yeah. We believe it. Really.
TomServo55> fine. just say it. say "TomServo55 does not have anything to do with kiddie porn"
THX-1138> But what about your inappropriate love for your mother?
Balthayzr> Say it? Ok.
Balthayzr> It.
TomServo55> say "Tomservo55 has nothing to do with kiddie porn"
Balthayzr> Why? You just said it. I consider the point made.
TomServo55> okay
Balthayzr> If you say you don't do it, well then, you say you don't do it.
TomServo55> we will speak no mor of kiddie porn after now. got it?
Balthayzr> Just don't do it anymore.
Balthayzr> You keep bringing it up!
THX-1138> I mean why do you keep bringing up your kiddie porn problems?
TomServo55> Fine. i wont bring it up if you dont.
THX-1138> We want to stop, but you keep saying you have a problem with kiddie porn
TomServo55> I DONT DO KIDDIE PORN!
Balthayzr> Does that mean you'll stop?
THX-1138> And then there's the part about your inappropriate love for your mother.
TomServo55> I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH KIDDIE PORN
THX-1138> I'd say people accusing you of collectiong kiddie porn as a problem
Balthayzr> You have no problem with it? What does that mean?
TomServo55> Fine. my mother never loved me. but, still, i never had anything to do with kiddie porn
THX-1138> She didn't love you in the way you wanted so now you have problems
TomServo55> I DONT HAVE PROBLEMS
THX-1138> You seem like you do.
Balthayzr> You must have, you seem to yell a lot about it.
TomServo55> I DONT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH KIDDIE PORN! WHY THE HELL CANT YOU PEOPLE JUST FUCKING ACCEPT THAT!?
THX-1138> We never mentioned kiddie porn
TomServo55> yes you do!
Balthayzr> Only after you get done screaming about it.
TomServo55> FINE! IF I DONT SAY ANYTHING MORE ABOUT KIDDIE PORN, THEN YOU DONT. GOT IT?
Balthayzr> Look at this, you mention Kiddie porn in every sentence.
TomServo55> GOT IT?
*** THX-1138 changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html And TomServo55 does not have a problem with kiddie porn.'
*** THX-1138 changes topic to ' UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html And TomServo55 does not have a problem with kiddie porn.'
TomServo55> fine leave it like that
THX-1138> Yeah, we know you don't have a problem. It's okay with you, right.
TomServo55> yes
Balthayzr> So, yo have no problem with it? Your'e comfortable with it?
THX-1138> Yeah, so you have no problems with kiddie porn
TomServo55> thats right, i have no problems with kiddie porn.
Balthayzr> You accept it with no problems, then?
THX-1138> Great.
THX-1138> So you have no problems with people who trade in kiddie porn. Excellent. I hope your happy with yourself.
TomServo55> no more talking about kiddie porn
Balthayzr> Then stop bringing it up. We say ok, then you start it up again!
TomServo55> Fine.
TomServo55> no more bringing it up.
*** THX-1138 changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html And TomServo55 does not have any problems with kiddie porn and totally accepts that it happens.'
TomServo55> what station is everybody rooting for MST3K to be on?
THX-1138> NBC.
Balthayzr> Friday nights, so far.
TomServo55> TBS
*** THX-1138 changes topic to ' UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -TomServo55 does not have any problems with kiddie porn like most people would have.'
Balthayzr> Well, he does tend to scream about it at length.
THX-1138> Only because he has no problems with it and feels that people who loke kiddie porn should be able to do what they do.
TomServo55> fine then...i have a problem with the fact that kiddie porn happens. but, i do not look at kiddie porn, and i do not appear in kiddie porn.
THX-1138> So you do have a kiddie porn problem?
Balthayzr> That's just dandy.
TomServo55> got that?
TomServo55> i have a problem with the fact that it happens.
THX-1138> By defninition, you have a kiddie porn problem
Balthayzr> So, that would qualify as a problem.
THX-1138> Sheesh, make up your mind.
Balthayzr> Which contradicts your earlier statements.
*** THX-1138 changes topic to ' UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -TomServo55 does have a kiddie porn problem.'
TomServo55> yes, thats a problem. kiddie porn problem = addicted to kiddie porn (I do not look at kiddie porn) problem with kiddie porn = i dont like the fact that it happens
TomServo55> i have a problem with kiddie porn
*** THX-1138 changes topic to ' UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html [TomServo55> i have a problem with kiddie porn'
Balthayzr> Ok, so we've ascertained that you have a problem.
TomServo55> i have a problem with the fact that it happens
TomServo55> change the topic to: changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -[TomServo55> i have a problem with the fact that kiddie porn happens. but, i do not look at kiddie porn.
THX-1138> I can't do that.
TomServo55> yes you can
Balthayzr> That's not what you were saying before.
THX-1138> Well, it's more clear and concise the way it is now
TomServo55> fine...i'll say it now then...
TomServo55> i have a problem with the fact that kiddie porn happens. but, i do not look at kiddie porn.
TomServo55> happy?
THX-1138> Yeah, it's not as concise though. We only have a small amount of space for the topic
TomServo55> +o me, and i'll change it then
Balthayzr> Well, I understand most peddlers of Kiddie porn don't look at it. Did you know that? I find it a little hard to swallow.
THX-1138> watch...
*** THX-1138 changes topic to 'UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -[TomServo55> i have a problem with the fact that kiddie porn happens. but,'
THX-1138> See, it doesn't fit.
*** THX-1138 changes topic to ' UPDATE: Please STOP writing letters. WATCH instead! http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -[TomServo55> i have a problem with kiddie porn'
TomServo55> bs
TomServo55> +o me
TomServo55> for one sec
Balthayzr> Why? It doesn't work any different for you than for us.
TomServo55> then change it to: http://www.mst3kinfo.com/satnews/saveshow.html -
TomServo55> have a problem with the fact that kiddie porn happens. but, i do not look at kiddie porn.
THX-1138> Can't.
Balthayzr> I thought you wanted to stop talking about kiddie porn, Tom.
TomServo55> fine, i'll leave you alone, and i wont ever come in here again. okay? you got what you wanted, youve bothered me, and i'm leaving. see ya.
THX-1138> I know. Now you suddenly have a big problem with kiddie porn
Balthayzr> Just what is up with that?
THX-1138> You want to stop talking about it, you say you have no problems with it, then you do. Now you can't stop talking about it
TomServo55> fuck you, fuck you all. you can seem to fucking get that through your fucking big ass mother fucking head: I have a problem that kiddie porn happens, but, i dont look at kiddie porn. fuck you.
*** TomServo55 (TomServo50@213-216-50.ipt.aol.com) has left #ForeverMST3K
Balthayzr> Yes, we not only admited you have no problem, we put it in our channel topic, and you're still not happy!!
Balthayzr> Uh, fuck?

Soon after finding his section, the following e-mail was recieved. We are pleased that he took the time to review his performance and to give his opinion.

From: "Mike Land"
To: Ironf@kih.net
Subject: HG-Ultra
Date: Thu, 01 Apr 1999 00:05:36 PST

"dear mother fucker...take the section down off of your crappy-ass
website about me, TomServo55. You feel so bad about your own pathetic
existance that you have to blame your bad child-hood experiances (or so
forth) in a manner of posting chat logs on your (as previously stated)
crappy-ass website. If you want to continue embarrasing yourselfs,
atleast ASK for PREMISSION first before posting chat logs. Take it
down..."

Just what is a "gaywad"?