September 20, 2001 "In no way was I intending to say, nor have I ever thought, that the men and women who defend our nation in uniform are anything but courageous and valiant, and I offer my apologies to anyone who took it wrong. [My criticism] was meant for politicians who, fearing public reaction, have not allowed our military to do the job they are obviously ready, willing and able to do, and who now will, I'm certain, as they always have, get it done." - Bill Maher, desperately trying not to be the nation's first celebrity scapegoat, apologizing for not toeing the patriotic line on Politically Incorrect. In addition, Maher has agreed to appear on the celebrity relief telethon on Friday, singing "God Bless America" while a Kansas kindergarten class takes turns kicking him in the nutsac.