Culkin. Engaged. (3/30/98)
In a move carefully calculated to set the nation's humorists and comedians into a frenzy, publicists for former "Home Alone" star Macauley Culkin announced that the 17 year old is engaged to marry fellow 17 year old child actor Rachel MinorIn a desperate attempt to beat every other jokester in the country to the punch, TMC NewsBreak makes the following editorial comment:
This will be a minor event, in which the minor Culkin will marry the minor Minor. It is unknown whether the minor Minor will change her name, or remain a Minor. The wedding may take place later this year, after both minors are majors, though the major Minor will still be a Minor.
Publicists for the couple refused to indicate what key the wedding march will be performed in.
