RODDENLOSERS bowleg> I can't wait to hear them sing campfire songs in GLORIOUS LETTERBOXED FORMAT!
KevinL> You'll finally get to see Shatner's paunch in the full 2.87 to 1 aspect ratio
BryanL1> Edited for content? They put some in?
bowleg> Arrakis. Dune. Aw, never mind.
bowleg> Saaaandstorm...
BryanL1> The planet of Galactic Peace, and damn good cherry pie, Diane.
bowleg> Saaaandstorm...
BryanL1> "Share Your Pain". An almost too appropriate motto for this flick.
Djenk1> BTW, My name's Clinton...Bill Clinton
Q> rock climbing, joel
Ironf> First one that says "Can't see Deforrest for de trees" gets Shot. Ohh, crap.
bowleg> So, 5 minutes into the movie and we have BOTH sandstorm and rock climbing.
KevinL> There was some Deep Hurting, too, but Sybok took it away.
Ironf> Starring William Shatner as Load.
BryanL1> Already, we're supposed to believe that Shatner can haul his sorry, fat ass up a mountain without Ding Dongs being at the top.
bowleg> Outward Bound goes horribly wrong.
Djenk1> Take me down to Paradise City where the Vulcans laugh and the plot is sh**ty
KevinL> Take me down to Paradise City where the sand is tan and the girls got 14 titties.
Q> i don't know but i been told - vulcan love is mighty cold
BryanL1> Space Fries are up.
bowleg> music by Albert Glasser.
Jamie> The Enterprise has gas.
Ironf> Apparently Scotty has already had some beans or something.
* bowleg does Takei voice until someone hits him
* Djenk1 hits bowleg
Jamie> McCoy loves beans, woo woo woo!
Q> oh please, movie - the last thing i wanna see is a start trek/blazing saddles beans scene
KevinL> Oh, no, Terrence. Beans. Looks like we'll be at war with these Indians soon.
BryanL1> Hey, Phillip! What's the secret ingredient in these beans? Ppppppth.
*** Q has quit IRC ((signed off))
BryanL1> Oh my God! The "Row, Row" killed Q! You bastards!
* Q says something muffly behind her orange parka hood.
BryanL1> OK, we're through the worst of it, folks. The song is over.
bowleg> well, there's still several dozen hours to go.
THX-1138> At least Shatner didn't do Tamborine Man.
Jamie> Take only liberties, leave only crappy movies.
bowleg> Ok, I'm already sick of the whole Star Trek thing.
KevinL> Parappa the Rapper is the new computer voice?
Jamie> Shatner's also got a shirt that says, "Just Suck."
Ironf> And one that says "Just Screw It!'
bowleg> wow, Starfleet uses Video Toasters.
Jamie> I thought they used replicators to make their space toast.
bowleg> hey space cut it out with the space jokes.
KevinL> But they're so space funny.
Jamie> Kirk captains from his Barcaspacelounger.
BryanL1> Meanwhile, on the monitors, Uhura's defragging her hard drive.
BryanL1> Why is there a wireframe schlong on Spock's monitor?
Jamie> That's the Space Jonah, Bryan.
Djenk1> Starfleet security: We Do more dying before 8 am than most troops do all day
BryanL1> Elite Paunchy Strike Force Alpha!
Jamie> The Incredibly Strange Uhura Who Got Mixed-Up and Agreed to Do This Bizarre Dance.
BryanL1> Nichelle Nichols IS Eartha Kitt IN the Gypsy Rose Lee story.
bowleg> rhubarb rhubarb space rhubarb
BryanL1> See! The damn letterbox is cutting off their feet!
Jamie> Bryan, I may have to kill you.
KevinL> But you lose the whole bottom and top of the movie!!!
Jamie> Scotty eats all he takes.
bowleg> Scotty would eat aluminium siding if it were smothered in gravy.
bowleg> Yeah yeah yeah, he shares their pain, they meet a fake space god, etc etc. etc. Yawn.
bowleg> You see, Spock. I am your space father.
KevinL> So, if you eat Lorna Doones in the Brig, are they Brig-a-Doones?
Jamie> If Brak was in space prison, he'd be Brig-a-Brak?
Kathmandu> If Bambi were in space prison, would she be a Brig-a-deer?
Jamie> Kirk has to take a space dump.
BryanL1> Kirk has to drop a couple of friends off at the space lake.
Djenk1> He is Sybok of Bore...resistance is futile.
Jamie> It's worse than that, we're dead Jim, dead Jim, dead Jim.
KevinL> That Turboshaft is one mean mutha...
Kathmandu> did he say Litterboxed edition?
KevinL> I hate litterboxed movies, 'cause they cut off the crap on the top and bottom.
Q> heaven's gate crap rubbed off on you at last, eh uhura?
BryanL1> Come on, McCoy. Don't be dark.
bowleg> Supressive persons!
THX-1138> Let your thetan go.
BryanL1> Pain and pain. What is pain?
bowleg> I was born in a cave my father built.
bowleg> What's good for John Travolta and Kirstie Alley is good for Leonard Nimoy!
Ironf> Shatner's fear: A strong burst of wind.
KevinL> I like my pain. I need my pain. I'm into that kind of kinky stuff.
Djenk1> I love my gay dead pain.
BryanL1> If everyone doesn't stop feeling everyone else's pain, this is gonna turn into one of "those" chat rooms.
Djenk1> The weather started getting rough, the Enterprized was tossed.
BryanL1> Arrakis. Dune.
bowleg> Boring planet?
Djenk1> Beep! This is God, your message is very important to me...
* bowleg punches Jamie
Jamie> This was *not* my idea.
* Jamie glares at Bryan.
* bowleg punches whoever thought of it
BryanL1> I didn't bring it up...
* bowleg punches everyone, then collapses into the foetal position
* Jamie glares at Q.
* bowleg turns into an eagle and then dropkicks Q
* KevinL punches cat, just to get in on the punchin'
BryanL1> Look! We're fighting amongst ourselves! Can't you see what this movie is doing to us!!!! Think of the children!
Q> so, god lives in a disco, then?
Kathmandu> too bad Connery couldn't add this movie to his credits alongside of Zardoz
BryanL1> And Highlander 2.
Jamie> and The Rock
Q> whoah, the planet's got a boner, dude!
Q> so this is mc rib-henge, eh?
KevinL> That was the original ending of the Abyss, before Cameron decided it should take place in the ocean.
Jamie> So, God basically runs a third-rate light show?
KevinL> Laser God!
Ironf> Everyone knows that Shatner thinks himself to be god.
Jamie> It's worse than that, he's God, Jim!
bowleg> give me this ship or I'll haaaaarm you!
Kathmandu> So, Captain Kirk gave God a photon torpedo suppository and we lived happily everafter.
Ironf> Go-Go Spock ears.
BryanL1> Good old unemotional swearing Spock.
Q> stephen spawking!
THX-1138> Do you Enterprise take this Bird of Prey...
Jamie> They *almost* dared to represent space as three-dimensional, there.
Jamie> Shatner ate god, and now he has heartburn.
Djenk1> Maybe he's somewhere in your left arota?
BryanL1> Aorta pound you.
Djenk1> Bry: Your vein of humor is bloody strange
Jamie> Oh, no. Here we row again.
THX-1138> So, who's the wife in this "family," McCoy or Spock?
Jamie> It's a gay Mormon thing, THX.
bowleg> There was no deity. God was found, alive and of normal size, 2000 miles away in Pat Robertson's brain.
BryanL1> Kill, kill, kill, me now!
BryanL1> Crappily, crappily, crappily, crappily
Djenk1> And who on earth is playing that masuki?
Jamie> So, what did we learn from the "movie"?
Kathmandu> we learned that God is an asshole
BryanL1> We learned that letting Shatner write is a bad idea, and letting Shatner write AS HE GOES ALONG is an even worse idea.
THX-1138> IF God visits you, kick him in the groin.
Djenk1> I learned that Shatner needs to beaten within an inch of his life with a dircetors chair.
bowleg> I learned I shouldn't go against my beliefs and watch Space Trek movies.
Jamie> I learned that Star Trek V really really sucks.
Ironf> I learned that if Shtner saw god, he would try to give him a wedgie.
KevinL> I learned that God is a big fake.
Q> i learned that crusty old space dogs can't sing.
bowleg> new rule: no more Trek movies, EVER.
Kathmandu> damn.....can that horn in the background get in tune
BryanL1> What's with the damn whining moose over Goldsmith's Klingon theme?
Q> augh! so who's playing first constipated duck in this orchestra?
THX-1138> Is that a dying goat?
KevinL> Who decided to stick a jazz oboist in the orchestra?!?
Ironf> I learned you can never get any straight answers when asking about downloading. :)
Kathmandu> sounds like someone's trying to step on a stork
Ironf> or a snork.
THX-1138> Downloading is a very private matter which you should only discuss with your priest.
